Guilty Pleasure

I walk into the store, watching my feet, to ashamed to look up or make eye contact with anyone else who dares enter. I guiltily shuffle up to the counter and mutter to the assistant ,who also radiates shame, what I have come into the store to purchase. I subtly look up and around, I make eye contact with another shopper and we both blush and immedietly break away. I am handed my purchase and money gets exchanged. 'How am I going to explan this?' I wonder to myself quietly.

I smuggle my new item into my bag and carefully walk outside, hoping not to run into anybody I know. Under the cover of dark, I still use my celebrity bug glasses to cover my face, just in case. I walk the back streets home, holding my bag close to my body, praying tonight isnt the night I'm mugged because of the sheer embarassment of the item in my bag. I get home and carefully check to see If I am alone. Bliss, I am.

I get my guilty pleasure out of my bag and stare at it for a few glorious minutes but before long I can no longer resist its temptations. I carefully slide it out of its packaging, checking the house once more for its emptiness. Before long I am in pure heaven. My heart rate increases, my mind relaxes and I begin to wonder why I would be so ashamed to like such a thing?

But im not talking about anything thats purchased in a dark and dingy alley way, or a dirty shop with no windows. Im talking about fast food.

When did we become so ashamed to purchase fast food? I blame Morgan Spurlock and his stupid campaign against McDonalds. The facts are, most people enjoy fast food. If such a vast majority of people disliked it then why are so many chain outlets still open? Getting someone to admitt they like fast food is like getting someone to admitt they like to masturbate. We ALL do it, we ALL enjoy it and lying about it just makes us feel better and cleaner about ourselves.

I currently live with a man who talks about fast food like its the latest AIDs virus. But I know his dirty little secret, he eats it... And why would he eat it if he didnt enjoy it?

We all feel better when the conversation of fast food comes up if we all pull that same disgusted face and say 'Oh no, I dont dare eat fast food. Do you know how processed it is? Or what its made of? Did you know if you leave a cheese burger in the fridge for a year it is still the same as the day you left it? Ergh, I cant imagine how many preservatives they pack into those little burgers!'

Well, Im here to tell you all something! I LOVE FAST FOOD! I love the fact that it looks the same a year after purchase, I love the fact that its fat content is enough for a week, I love the fact that its over processed junk! LOVE LOVE LOVE! It tastes good, its convinient, it fills you up and if you eat it as a treat it DOESNT AFFECT YOU WHAT SO EVER!

So to all the high nosed toss bags out there who 'poohoo' the junk food phenomenon, I poohoo you and your non doughnut, non pizza eating backsides...

I bet you are the same bunch of people who sit on your high horses and claim 'I wouldnt dare even think about masterbation, how dirty!'



So, from a FAST FOOD LOVER
adios and happy hamburgers
Poppitxo